Old habits die hard

If change is inevitable, why is it that old habits are just so hard to break out of? When I'm strong, healthy, and stress-free, of course I'm confident and happy. But all it takes is one sick day, some bad food (i.e. caf food), some added assignments with tight time constraints, and I break. Then I'm back to comparing myself to people, obsessing over petty/trivial things, and blaming myself. All the things I don't like about myself. Not as bad as in the past, but I break nonetheless. This talent of mine to self-destruct is something that needs to go. I need to find a way to be calm and content all the time, not just in between freak-outs.

If you've figured it out, do let me in on your secrets.

Title-less

As of late, I have had less of an urge to write in this blog. The reason for this I believe is two-fold. 1) Things are much more settled this term. There simply isn't the drama there was last term. Of course, I could rant about bald, shiny, annoying O'Donovan or my sadistic physics lab TA but I'm lazy and it's so much easier to rant out loud. Aside from that, I'm just content and contentment doesn't make for an exciting blog. 2) The things that are on my mind can't be expressed in this medium. There certainly isn't a lack of things on my mind. They're just not the sort of thoughts that can be posted on a blog.

There is one thing worth noting. (Well I'm probably not a good judge of whether or not it is worth noting but I'm excited about it anyhow.) Coaching starts up again tonight and this term is going to be very different. Last term, the power skating class had 10 people in it. This term, there are 25 people registered and a waiting list. I know there may not be a correlation but I'm going to take it as a compliment. (I take enough things as insults that aren't really so that's how I justify taking this one the other way. Balance things out.) Also the other coach is the guy that ran the hockey program last term. It'll be helpful to have someone who knows hockey on the ice so I can defer the jackass trying to undermine me just because I'm a figure skater. Also, he quieter than I am which is key given that I'll take over anyhow. No clue how we'll manage 25 skaters but I guess we'll find out tonight, now won't we?

Various thoughts and happenings...

-> I hate computers. But more importantly, I don't like people who know oh so much about computers, but can't explain any of it in plain English. At the very least, the prof should be able to explain things, even those that are 'so obvious'. Yeah, obvious if you've been writing computer programs for most of your life. It isn't obvious to me and as a teacher, it is your job to explain things, even those horribly simple things.

-> Anne's coming to Waterloo!! And we're going to have a girl's night out dancing. I haven't been out dancing in months. I'm really excited about her getting to meet everyone here.

-> I want to paint Prof. O'D's head like an easter egg. Or at least do something to cut down on the shine.

-> Another year older and this is a big one. 20. Yesterday, I turned 20. I'm halfway to 40, I'm no longer a teenager, and I'm now 'in my early 20s'. For all that I've joked about denying this birthday, and for all that I'm terrified of getting old, I'm also excited about it. It's an exciting point in my life.

-> I like not having to make decisions. I like surprises even more. Well safe surprises. Not the scary ones. I like the ones where you know it'll be good but you just don't know what it is.

-> I need to be active. Not working out, or not even going outside is a bad idea for not only my physical and mental health, but also for the happiness and well-being of those around me. I'm a cranky bitch if I don't get my endorphin rush. teehee I'm an endorphin junkie.

Note: I realize the high dullness factor of this post. But I haven't posted lately and so even though nothing exciting has happened lately that I can write about, I decided to post anyhow. So you get to read this lackluster post. Lucky you.

Communism Physics!

New definition of communism: Works in theory, but doesn't exist in reality.

I am so cool. I am super bad.

How many times have you washed your hair in the last couple of days?
That's hard. Makes me have to think.

I'll if you.

Is that stripey thing a shirt or a scarf?

Jon's not funny. Make him stop talking.
I can say funny things. Just wait for it.

I like Vietnamese food.

I'm a mathlete. I want a shirt that proclaims this fact.

I love ... carpet? I love ... lamp? I drank a lava lamp.

The iguanas fly in squares...counter-clockwise.
No you fly in elipses.

This one's for all the suckers who still believe in love.

I'm not that desperate ... for content.

Hey look it's a bunny.

I'm not that much of a nerd.

These brownies are sticky.

I know she's only 12 ... but she looks 13.

A new year, a new address, a new era ... and the same old strangeness.